plugging away

34-365 Fly away

I’ve had a hard-working week, so sleep has been more of a priority than blogging around here. I’m working hard to pull myself out of a slump; I’d been feeling down and getting down on myself for not picking up all the pieces of my life. The last couple of days have been better. Some things that have perked me up a little bit:

  • My lovely family – I woke up Saturday morning upset from a dream where people were parading through my home with phone messages of all the things I had done wrong or neglected to do. Q came to invite me down for french toast breakfast and ended up comforting me. She’s such a good girl. Besides being his usual affectionate self, David has been patient with my dumping out bags of papers all over the house to get things onto…
  • A master list – I’ve been trying to jot down everything I need to do as I think of it (or as I come across a pertinent piece of paper). It’s an old Getting Things Done trick that works well (when I use it).
  • A Darcy story – I read a story where Colonel Fitzwilliam had been wounded in the Napoleonic wars and was drowning himself in drink. His doctor gave him the following advice: “Sometimes I pray.” This has sparked all kinds of reflection, and, of course…
  • Prayer – I read something this week along the lines of, “Don’t just take your troubles to the Lord. Leave them with Him.” Ah, yes. I have been toting my troubles around with me everywhere, taking them out and examining them and mourning over my uselessness. It goes right along with thinking too much about myself; I need to let it go and let it STAY gone.

I have a postcard with this quote on it: “Courage is simply the willingness to be afraid and act anyway.” I’ve gotten the first part of that – the fear – down pat; now I’m trying to live up to the second part. Wish me luck!

Image by Jin Choi via Flickr – Thank you!

runners? hi!

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Such a fun night tonight! I got to go to Deb’s house for a craft night and meet the women from her running group. I was impressed by two things:

One, those girls were so warm and friendly to me, though only one had met me before (and hadn’t seen me in eight years or so) and though I am a complete and utter non-runner. Just a lovely group of women!

Two – and this will surprise no one – Deb is a crafting wizard. We made so many cute things! There were crafts stations for sewing a Christmas bunting and for making holiday signs, magnets, candles, and three kinds of Christmas trees. My favorites were the distressed-wood signs (mine says “Joy to the world”) and these adorable curled-paper Christmas trees. I spent ages getting mine just how I wanted it… and actually achieved that outlandish goal! Martha Stewart Deb had gone above and beyond the call of duty, planning the crafts, getting all the supplies prepped, and teaching all of us how to do each one.

All around, it was an excellent night out. Once again, I am promising you photos, but I swear I will get some and put them up. These things were just too cute to miss. (Edited to add: Here’s a photo from Deb! The little trees and the “Joy to the World” sign are mine. Love them!)

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Thanks a million, Deb! (As my Hudson Taylor boys said on Facebook tonight, Go raibh míle maith agaibh!) xo

it’s not me, it’s you

C.S. Lewis said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.” How good are you at placing others before yourself?

Oh, humility…. I have had you backwards all these years.

I have spent my lifetime thinking about all the ways in which I don’t measure up. I’m also aware of the ways I measure up just fine, but I dwell on and obsess about the ways in which I don’t. Not only does this negatively impact my regard for myself, it negatively impacts my relationships with others. A few examples: not having people over because my house is not clean enough; not going out with people because I have too many things I’m behind on; spending my time on “I’m-not-good-enough” instead of “you-and-I-are-awesome-and-we-should-hang-out.”

It’s a good wake-up call for me. I need to take time for others and not think so much about myself, even if that self-centeredness is focused on how I can be a better person, as opposed to how great a person I already am. If I just forgot about myself and spent the same amount of time thinking of others, I’d have a chance to make a much more positive impact on the world.